how can u be prego again
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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