That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize