whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
