You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
