I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize