Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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