C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Randomize
