I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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