we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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