I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
