i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
