people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
love makes seman taste better
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
