is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
