Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
