so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
