cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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