When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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