New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
She even gives head with a lisp.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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