Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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