I'm gonna have a badass scar
my vag is so smooth its legendary
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
