she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
