I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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