The beer is more important than you right now.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
