Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
