hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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