the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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