I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize