Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
