Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
so let's talk penis.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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