Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
