love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
