So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize