My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
