Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
