porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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