i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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