At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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