If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
