1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
