Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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