She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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