Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
