**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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