bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
