they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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