True but thats because hes a fetus.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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