i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
