And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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