I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
