Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
