So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
