Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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